Except I don't care what you say, IT WAS WEIRD

Two weeks ago, when Dave was outside one night putting the trash can away, our new neighbor came over and invited us to a housewarming party for the following Saturday night. Dave thanked him for the invite and said something that I imagine was along the lines of, “Oh, yeah, okay, see you then,” because that is how men communicate with each other, they do not think to ask about the START TIME of this party, or whether we could BRING SOMETHING, or even possibly WHAT IS YOUR WIFE’S NAME.

Anyway, in the following days there was some discussion about going to the party with some other neighbors who had been invited, and we decided that yes, we would all drop by in the spirit of Being Good Neighbors, but we figured we would do it after the kid was in bed, you know, take the baby monitor two doors down and have a beer and then pretend he was crying so we had an excuse to leave. (We expected it to be, uh, kind of lame. Possibly awkward. I’M JUST BEING HONEST.)

But then Saturday, we return home at around 5:30 from an outing to Home Depot where we bought stuff to make our house look marginally pretty for the next two or three weeks (until I forget to water all the flowers and they rot and die) and we had just come inside the house when there was a knock on the door. Dave opened it, and lo and behold…

“Hey!” said our new neighbor. “Aren’t you guys coming over? The party’s in FULL SWING.”

“Uhhhh, yes?” said my husband. “Yeah, yeah, uh, we’ll be right there.”

“Okay, see you in a few!” said our neighbor.

And then Dave closed the door and then he turned to look at me and I just stared at him because, DUDE, are you KIDDING ME? It is not enough to just INVITE us to your party, you have to come to our door to REMIND US that you’re having the party and then ask us point blank if we’re coming? Is there any chance we can say no to your face? I DIDN’T THINK SO.

In a way, kind of genius. I mean, now we HAD to go. He put us on the spot! The party was already RAGING, right? And then, on the other hand, WHAT A DIRTY TRICK that makes for a very socially awkward gathering. I felt like I was attending at gunpoint! And we were the only neighbors who came! Everyone else was WORK FRIENDS! And it WAS an awkward party! And then Asher fell off their deck headfirst and almost gave himself a concussion!

EXCEPT! The one marginal saving grace was that when we got there, the new neighbor mentioned that two other neighbors had dropped by for a few moments but that we had just missed them. “Oh, too bad!” I said. “Who were they?”

WHO WERE THEY, INTERNET? Oh, just the president of the homeowners association and her lovely friend Edna. What a lively party THAT would have been! All four of us in a room together with smoke coming out of our ears! Welcome to the neighborhood!

Anyway, then we did our part to make the party more awkward because Dave and I went ahead and told all the awful Edna stories against our better judgment and now our new neighbors probably just think WE’RE the jerks for getting all snooty and mean about the two nice older ladies who stopped by earlier. We probably shouldn’t have even opened our big mouths. We probably shouldn't have let our kid fall off the deck either, but we'll let bygones be bygones and all that other crap.

You probably don’t really care all that much about this stupid story, but I did want to know: the knocking on the door while the party was in session and asking us when we were coming? Now that’s weird, right?

Comments

[Lawyerish]

Uh, yeah. WEIRD. I think my first instinct would have been to yell, "No, we're not coming to your STUPID PARTY!" and slam the door in his face.

Also, who invites someone to a party and then doesn't mention the start time?

Of course, we're talking about someone who SHAMES THEIR NEIGHBORS into coming to their housewarming, so nevermind. I am surprised you didn't walk in the door and have them demand their housewarming gift.

[Karly]

Yeah that is weird, but I bet the wife got all irritated with the husband for not giving your husband specific details and so she sent him back over to remind you guys just in case. You think? Maybe? Or yeah, they are just weird.

[pseudostoops]

Yes, weird. But it could have been what Karly said. I guess. But still weird.

[CrystalMK]

Ya know, some people are just clueless. Take my friend last week. She had a Southern Living party. I found out from a mutual friend, one that I talk to a lot more, that the reason she was having the party was so that ALL OF HER FRIENDS COULD BUY HER SOMETHING FOR HER NEW HOUSE!!! Did I mention she had a new house? Her second. And her second marriage. At which she had a second bridal shower and full wedding. And expected everyone to act like that first one just never happened.

So, yes, WEIRD!! If you had already known them and getting together was a thing everyone did often around there, then that would be okay. You would be able to say "oh sorry, no, we can't tonight" or "yes, but its going to have to be later" because you guys would have a repoire. But not at this point. Maybe he just moved from a really tight neighborhood and hasn't yet realized that he moved and these neighbors are different and also, not privy to his past relationships? Just because your old neighborhood was close doesn't mean it carries over, right? lol

[Dr. Maureen]

Maybe he remembered that he hadn't told you what time?

[nonsoccermom]

Yeah, that is pretty weird. Seems to me he should have been at home enjoying his party and not harrassing the neighbors.

[Emily]

It's VERY weird! And also, how did he know that you guys had just gotten home? Was he (gulp) peering out their window, waiting for you to get home? I only ask because we have neighbors who would do that-- we, in fact, have a neighbor who climbs up on a ladder so that he can look over our fence at us. YEAH. WEIRD.

[Stephanie]

They are FREAKS. I kid, but seriously they are a little over the top. I was nervous enough asking my neighbors about my missing cat and I had a flyer, sob story and everything.

[steff]

definitely weird...its almost like they were watching your door like hawks.

[Beth B.]

yah that is weird and awkward.

[JP]

I think the first invite was OK. Stopping over earlier in the day might have been fine if he made up a pretense... can I borrow a hose? But knocking on the door, while the party was in progress, is awkward. Describing it as "in FULL SWING!" is lame. Was he wearing a pocket protector?

[HeatherK]

It didn't seem to strange to me as in my old neighborhood we would have done that. I guess to me it seemed just really informal and maybe more appropriate if you knew them better. I'd just cross it off the obligation list and hope the neighborly bbq's aren't a more regular occurence!

[Mandi]

Sounds like someone REALLY wants to be your friends. Flattering, no? Or just too much? I'm on the fence on this one.

[Taylor]

I have neighbors who do that ALL THE TIME! Every Friday night they have a little "get together" with the neighbors and they come over and knock on our doors at 8:30 (which is WAYYY past PJ time for me) and drunkenly slurr "are-shh your commin' to the parrrrtyy?"

And I always feel so awkward because while they are perfectly lovely people, they are also perfectly ginormous rednecks. And I grew up in Alabama and am currently living in MASSACHUSETTS. And these people are bigger rednecks than AU Kappa Alpha brothers AND YOU KNOW EXACTLY HOW BAD THAT IS.

So I feel you.

[Lala]

too funny, are you on Twitter? cause I'd follow you in a heartbeat.

[andrea]

Very weird, but sounds a lot like something that would have happened in our neighborhood. It is fair to say that I've considered closing the blinds and parking the cars in the back alley to avoid a neighborhood party or two. Can't go into any more details, because god forbid they find this out and then I won't be able to pull that one off again.

[Wickedly Scarlett]

Oh yeah, DEFINITELY weird! I so looked forward to moving into our house and having fun neighborhood block parties, and waving to neighbors as they walked by, but it just doesn't seem like it's turned out that way in "real life".

[Kellie]

Weird - definitely weird.

[Tressa]

They are totally crushing on you two.

[Ashley]

weird, if not desperate. but you're right, how could you avoid going after that move?

[Jenn]

Weird and desperate. I mean, if you wanted to go, you would go, right?

[Jennifer]

That is totally weird and uncomfortable-making.

Whenever we have something I usually languish in sweaty anxiety from the official time the party stars to when people actually show up fearing that no one will come. I would never in my life go badgering my guests into showing up. How awkward!

[kris]

Hmmm. This scenario has the potential for one of those creepy swingers events from the 70s. Neighbor dude shows up at your house begging you to come because you and hubby are adorable, you show up, thinking it's just a "Tupperware party" and next thing you know your keys are in a glass and you are pretending you can hear your rotary phone ringing next door. Time for a bigger peephole. ;)

[haze]

If the party really WAS in FULL SWING, then he would have been too busy enjoying himself to come knocking at your door, n'est-ce pas?

[Clio]

Completely weird. This is why I shun homeowners association type communities. We live out in the country, where the neighbors ride dirt bikes in the evening and go out and get the paper in their ratty underwear.